Friday Fish Time: How to train your dragonfishPosted: September 14, 2012
Suit up, knights in neoprene armour. If you’re looking to impress a potential mate, look no further than the potential of a dragonfish. Luckily we have some tips on how to catch and train your dragonfish.
- Dragonfish live in the dimly-lit twilight zone, like 200 or so metres down. Contact James Cameron to hitch a ride.
- It’s dark down there. Take your fashionable underwater headtorch.
- Look, shiny object! Don’t be distracted by the dragonfish’s illuminated barbel. Repeat after me: I am not prey. I am not prey.
- Steer clear of it’s numerous large pointy teeth.
- Raise your lance (or speargun) and take accurate aim. Dragonfish are around 30cm in length.
- Stick it with the pointy end.
- Train* your dragonfish to woo your desired mate with it’s mesmerising blue and pinkish light. Hello ladies.
- You now rule the ocean.
* We recommend consulting the works of Pavlov